victoriarch: crescent moon against a daytime-blue sky (dreams)
[personal profile] victoriarch
I dreamed that me and my school's ACE team (ACE is a NW Arkansas competitive academic league, similar to Quiz Bowl) were in the church building where my friend had her 18th birthday party. The building was slightly altered in my dream, as buildings often are. I think this building belonged to the A*en family or the C**wder family. There was a room of refrigerators with soda in them. None of the fridges had Sprite bottles, so I unboxed a warm bottle of sprite and put it in a fridge to cool.

then I joined a volleyball game in the gymnasium. I was teamed up with classmates against a team of strangers. It was a SUPER close game. I remember one girl on the other team was getting ready to serve, so she twirled the ball in her fingers. It was the smoothest most beautiful action I think I'd ever seen and it actually made my stomach flip. Like I said, it was a close game, but two player on the other team hit the ball out, giving us the points we needed to win. So yeah, we won. woooooo.

Then I remember going into the kitchen of this same building. The kitchen counters were much higher than a normal kitchen, so high that there were pointlessly dysfunctional. The kitchen was very dirty. For some reason I felt obligated to clean it. I though Mrs. C**wder might blame the dirtiness on me.

There was a little girl in the kitchen. She climbed up on the counter and pulled down a huge blue dust bin. The little girl gave it to me. The dust bin was just as disgusting as everything else in the kitchen. I climbed back on the counter and tried to put it back in the place where it'd been been set. But it didn't stay, and it fell down into a huge hole in the counter top below where a lot of supplies were piled up. It was a little gross down there so I didn't bother trying to retrieve it. I think Mrs C**wder walked in then, and I walked out.

I went to the Fridge room. I think I went to get water, then I saw the single Sprite in one of the fridges. It took me a second to REMEMBER that I put the Sprite in there earlier that day. I decided that since it was night time I would leave the Sprite there until morning, then I would have it. I also noticed that someone put a whole thing of Sprite cans into one of the fridges. But I was more into plastic bottle sprites.

---

Like the previous dream, Quiz Bowl Consciousness, I'm writing this nearly a month after I had the dream, so my interpretation cannot do it justice. But I'll do my best.

Grace's church building was very surreal irl. It felt separate from the rest of the world and it felt very chill. I do remember getting in trouble with Grace's mom for venturing upstairs. I feel very embarrassed every time I get in trouble with someone's parents, so maybe that feeling seeped into the whole kitchen thing with Mrs. C**wder?

The dirty kitchen reminds me of that food poisoning dream set in my pizza in MY parents' dirty kitchen. I think the kitchen's dirtiness is very much connected to the constant mild discomfort I have with myself. It matches that feeling exactly. A kitchen is supposed to be a welcoming place that provides you food and comfort, but I didn't really want to touch anything in this kitchen. And I felt like I had to do something about it, but there was no way for me to do anything about it because the counters were too high for me to reach supplies (without CLIMBING, ugh), and all the supplies were mildly dirty anyways. When I look at myself, I see how bad I am at interacting with people, how much I don't want to bother, how much I never feel like doing anything, I never feel like talking, I try to get my conversations over with as quickly as possible, I try to be funny but I fail and make myself look socially inept, etc. A lot of things that are POSSIBLE to fix through intentional effort, but the problem is I don't want to take the effort. I don't want to go outside my comfort zone. Even though it's not something that should be THAT hard. It's just talking to people. And I don't have crippling social anxiety, so it really shouldn't be THAT hard to clean the dust pan and clean the kitchen. It's all dirty, but it's the sticky/slightly-stained/unwashed dishes kind of dirty, not the moldy/food-caked-on-everything kind of disgusting. So just. do it. Stop procrastinating.

^^^that paragraph was very free-written and I'm not reading back over it, so sorry that it's probably repetitive and hard to read. I was just jog my own understanding.

Not sure what's up with the Sprite or volleyball, but I have like 4 other old dreams to record, so I'll deem this an adequate place to stop.

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victoriarch: screencap of Haruhi Fujioka with the sunset behind him (Default)
victoryarch

October 2016

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